Garfield: May I have you attention, please!
Garfield: Ladieees and gentleman! Odie-the-Amazing will now dive into this glass of water!
Garfield: Of course, he is going to need a little encouragement
Garfield: Go for it, Odie! I'm going to make you a star!
Garfield: Whoah! Let go! Let go!
Odie: (splut!)
Garfield: (sploot!)
Jon: When you own pets, there's never a dull moment
Odie: Grrrr!
Garfield: Great! It's here!
Garfield: Some people wear their emotions on their sleeves
Garfield: I wear my opinions on my belly
Garfield: Cut that out, Odie!
Garfield: How would you like it if I licked you?
Garfield: It just occurred to me. Someday I'm going to have to put this tongue back in my mouth
Scale: Hey, buddy, I'm a bathroom scale
Garfield: So?
Scale: So I don't do livestock
Scale: Me and my big voice chip
Jon: What say we rest this lunch off in the park?
Garfield: Splendid idea
Jon: That was a great lunch. Boy, am I stuffed!
Jon: Look at the size of this belly
Garfield: Oh, yeah? Look at this!
Jon: I'm fatter than you are
Garfield: Check this out
Woman: You two are disgusting
Jon: It's no wonder we're still single, right, Garfield
Garfield: Burp
Jon: BURP
Garfield: BURP
Woman: Ignore them, Melissa. Men are not a pretty sight
Jon: Why the long face, Garfield
Garfield: I don't know
Jon: Are you depressed because you're fat and lazy and out of shape
Garfield: Why is it friends aren't happy until they've giver some direction to your depression?
Jon: You look a little depressed, Garfield
Garfield: Bingo
Jon: Just remember, when you're flat on your back, the only way to look is up
Garfield: Thank you, Jon. I am no longer depressed
Garfield: Now I'm suicidal
Jon: I have some words of wisdom to help you beat those old blues, buddy
Garfield: He's gonna get cryptic again
Jon: Even a stopped clock is right twice a day
Garfield: Oh, great... I'm going to be up all night figuring that one out
Jon: I have you figured out, Garfield. You refused to take life on because you're afraid of failure
Garfield: That shows what Jon knows about human nature
Garfield: Actually, I have a deep-seated fear of success
Garfield: Garfield, your life is a big, fat drag. Do you know that?
Garfield: You sleep to escape. You eat to escape...
Garfield: You need more escapes
Garfield: Boy, am I in a rotten mood (thwack)
Odie: (CRASH!)
Garfield: This must be serious... That didn't even cheer me up
Garfield: (SPLAT! toing)
Garfield: And now some carrots for color
Jon: Interesting
Garfield: (toing)
Jon: And just how long have you been sticking food to the ceiling
Garfield: Oh, for quite some time now
