Jon: ODIE! GET AWAY FROM THAT TREE! GARFIELD! GET OUT OF THAT SAND TRAP!
Man: Would you mind observing proper gold etiquette there, mister
Jon: I'm sorry but my pets are driving me nuts
Man: It's the outfit I'm talking about
Jon: (crack!)
Jon: Oh, no! I hit and old lady in the head and knocked her out cold!
Jon: What should I do, Garfield?
Garfield: Id straighten that left arm a bit and turn that right hand over more
Garfield: ROWR!
Jon: GARFIELD! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THAT SAND TRAP?
Garfield: Squatting on a sandbur, thank you
Jon: Well, boys, it's been a nice vacation, but it's time to heap home
Jon: Good heavens! What happened to you guys?!
Garfield: Odie discovered how to dial room service
Odie: Burp
Jon: Here we are! Home sweet home!
Jon: ARRRGH!
Jon: OKAY, WHO LEFT THE FAUCET RUNNING?!
Garfield: I didn't want my sponge collection to dry out
Garfield: MY BED! ODIE'S SLEEPING IN MY BED!
Garfield: This calls for a good stomping!
Garfield: (STOMP, STOMP, STOMP)
Garfield: So much for my french bread and olive collection
Garfield: Some people wonder why I hat Mondays
Garfield: Maybe I'm fatalistic (bap)
Garfield: But I suspect I'm just stupid
Garfield: (scratch, scratch, scratch)
Jon: (WHAM!)
Garfield: I'm not very fond of Tuesdays, either
Garfield: I am absolutely not getting out of bed today
Jon: Hey, Garfield, there's a spider on your blanket
Garfield: I keep forgetting we live a generation without absolutes
Garfield: I'll teach him to be a spider! (STOMP, STOMP, STOMP, STOMP)
Garfield: He won't have the guts to do that again
Garfield: Better safe than sorry (STOMP, STOMP, STOMP, STOMP)
Jon: Look at this
Jon: A cat stroking his owner!
Jon: Why so affectionate, Garfield?
Garfield: I just squashed a spider
Garfield: I'm lonely. I think I'll see if I can find Arlene
Lady cat: Hi there
Arlene: You two-timing swine!
Garfield: What happened?
Garfield: Hi, Arlene
Arlene: DON'T SPEAK TO ME, YOU CAD. I SAW YOU WITH THAT OTHER WOMAN!
Garfield: Oh come on now. Do I look like the kind of guy who could easily attract women?
Arlene: I supposed you're right
Garfield: And just what do you mean by that?!
Garfield: Here is your dinner, my dear (blat)
Arlene: Is this food fresh?
Garfield: Ha ha ha, why of course!
Garfield: This is only yesterdays newspaper
