Garfield: QUICK! QUICK! PUT POOKY'S ARM BACK ON!
Jon: Relax, Garfield. I'll fix Pooky right up. It's no big deal
Garfield: No big deal?! Look, buster. I've never lost a loved one before
Jon: I sewed Pooky's arm back on as good as new, Garfield
Garfield: Yes, but will he ever play the piano again?
Jon: Me thinks the cat doth expect too much
Garfield: You did a pretty good job of sewing Pooky's arm on
Jon: I used small stitches so as not to leave a scar
Garfield: I think he's picking on me
Garfield: Pooky, when you lost your arm, I got to thinking about our mortality, and that's depressing
Garfield: So promise me you'll never lose your arm again, okay?
Garfield: I wonder what my fortune cookie fortune is.
Today you will be whisked away to a large white building where all you have to do is lie in bed all day as lots of people pay attention to you and bring you food
Garfield: That sounds too good to be true
Garfield: I can stare anything down
Jon: Uh, Garfield. Fish can't blink
Garfield: Now he tells me... Now that my eyeballs are all dried out
Garfield: I wonder what awful thing is going to happened to me today? Maybe the sky will fall. Maybe Odie will bring his long lost twin brother home..
Garfield: Or worse yet, maybe Nermal will come for a visit
Garfield: Oh sure, you're getting all the attention right now, Nermal. But when you grow up you'll be as unloved as I am
Nermal: I'm never growing up
Garfield: Who are you? Peter Pan or something
Nermal: I'm a midget
Garfield: Some cats get all the luck
Nermal: If you want to be cute like me, you have to play with a ball of yarn
Garfield: That sounds simple enough
Nermal: Yours is over there
Garfield: I hate him
Garfield: Nermal, you're so sweet, why don't I just stuff you into this sugar bowl
Nermal: Go ahead and try it, fat boy
Jon: Say, Garfield, where's Nermal?
Garfield: At a humility lesson
Garfield: You disgust me, Nermal
Garfield: You're a wide-eyed mindless little piece of fluff. You're so cute everyone loves you
Nermal: Eat your heart out, bozo
Garfield: I am, I am
Garfield: You've overstayed your welcome
Nermal: Unk
Jon: Where's Nermal?
Garfield: You know... It was strange, he muttered 'unk' and then left without a word
Garfield: And just when I thought it was safe to go back in the kitchen
Jon: Garfield, why don't you like to take baths?
Garfield: Bathing robs cats of precious natural oils that protect us from skin disease
Jon: What do you know? Hop in there right now
Garfield: Let me get my tubby toys
Jon: Today, today
Jon: There now, don't you feel much better?
Garfield: Much
Jon: Are you sure you want to watch this, Garfield
Jon: It's a depressing movie about a man-eating lion that terrorizes a native village
Garfield: You rot for your side, I'll root for mine
Jon: I hate movies about man-eating lions
Jon: How can an animal possibly prey on an innocent victim?
Garfield: Explain that to the chicken you wad for dinner
Jon: OH, NO! THE LION RAN DOWN ANOTHER VILLAGER!
Garfield: The original fast-food franchise
Jon: Now what disgusting thing is the lion doing?
Garfield: He's spitting the spear out