Garfield: That's the thing about canned salmon
Garfield: It's easier to catch when it heads upstream to spawn
Dog: GRRRR
Garfield: ROWR!
Dog: (yip, yip, yip)
Garfield: One of these days this fierce routine's gonna get me creamed
Lyman: Snicker, snicker
Jon: What are you snickering about, Lyman
Lyman: I've solved our mouse problem
Jon: How so?
Lyman: I've set out mousetraps baited with lasagna
Jon: Oh no!
Jon: NOT LASAGNA?!
Garfield: (snap! snap! snap! snap! snap! snap! snap!)
Jon: I'm putting you on a diet, Garfield. You may have whatever you can sip through a straw
Garfield: (SUCK!)
Jon: Back to the drawing board
Garfield: Do you know what constitutes a diet food?
Garfield: It's not the calories, it's not the protein, it's not the fiber...
Garfield: It's the bland
Jon: How goes the diet, Garfield?
Jon: Have you lost anything yet?
Garfield: Yes
Garfield: My sense of humor
Jon: Remember, Garfield, one drumstick a day on your diet and that's it
Jon: What the...
Garfield: I found a butcher who carries pterodactyl
Jon: You'll have to admit, Garfield
Jon: Now that you're on a diet, you're feeling better about yourself
Garfield: You bet
Garfield: Aside from the hunger, dizziness and weakness, I'm having a ball
Scale: You're the correct weight...
Scale: For an aircraft carrier, ha-ha
Scale: I shouldn't have said that
Jon: Garfield, I wish you wouldn't keep burying Odie in the sand
Garfield: Big deal
Garfield: I only buried him up to his knees
Jon: Don't like your cat food, huh?
Jon: Is there anything I can give it?
Garfield: Last rites comes to mind
Jon: You've finally done it, Garfield
Jon: You've tangled with something bigger than you
Garfield: Yeh, but you should see the other truck
